After Texas defensive end Colin Simmons put up a Longhorn record-tying five sacks against Tennessee in a gritty 20-17 win, he decided to “celebrate” with a move that blew up the internet and probably had NFL execs at 345 Park Avenue doing spit takes: he pretended to urinate on the field. Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up. It was so out there, so beyond the pale, that the officials flagged him for unsportsmanlike conduct, later explaining he was “simulating using the restroom.” Wild.
The Flag That Could’ve Been A Ban
Think about that for a second: “simulating using the restroom.” The sheer audacity of it, right after an absolutely dominant performance. Simmons actually seemed surprised when the yellow flag flew, which just makes the whole thing even more bizarre. This wasn’t some subtle gesture; this was a full-on, in-your-face, pretend-pee-on-the-turf moment. The source even says it’s something that “possibly would have gotten him banned for life” by the NFL, and when you put it in those terms, the severity of the act really hits. Five sacks in a game is legendary stuff, something you’ll tell your grandkids about. But this? This is what everyone’s talking about. It completely overshadowed the incredible individual effort and the team’s narrow victory. You gotta wonder what was going through his head in that moment to pull off something so reckless.
Sarkisian’s “Look At Me” Society Rant
Texas coach Steve Sarkisian addressed the whole mess after the game, and his initial response was totally on point. He said they “took him out,” “addressed it,” and then put him back in. Sarkisian was clear: “I’m not gonna give the guy the death penalty over an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty. We’ve got to fix it though. That can’t continue as we move forward.” That’s fair. A coach has to manage a player, correct behavior, and keep things in perspective. You don’t bench a guy for life over one dumb mistake, especially when he’s tearing it up.
But then, Sarkisian veered into some truly head-scratching territory. “Unfortunately, in our society right now, we live in the ‘look at me’ society,” he said. “All of you guys have your Twitter accounts, and as fast as you can type something becau” Hold up. Did he just blame “society” and social media for a player pretending to pee on the field? While the “look at me” culture is definitely a thing, pinning a bizarre, explicit on-field action like this on the general state of the world feels like a cop-out. It got a little screwy there. You expect a coach to own the moment and the player’s actions, even if he’s not “giving him the death penalty.”
Moving Forward After The Sideline Drama
So, where do things go from here? Sarkisian made it crystal clear that this kind of stunt “can’t continue as we move forward.” He’s right, of course. The team got the win, but this celebration is the headline. You gotta believe that in the locker room, and in practice this week, those conversations are going to be less about the five sacks and more about maintaining discipline and professional conduct. The focus has to be on making sure future celebrations highlight the athletic achievement, not some viral moment of questionable taste. It’s a reminder that even in victory, there are lessons to learn and standards to uphold, especially when you’re playing at such a high level.
This article was created with AI assistance and published under Seattle On Tap’s editorial standards. See our Editorial Policy.
Originally reported by Pro Football Talk.
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